Interesting title, huh? I couldn’t really think of anything that described this post so that was all I could come up with for now.
I have been doing a lot of reading the last few weeks on learning disabilities. Our youngest was diagnosed with some when she was about 7. Now I ask myself, just how can they determine that a child has a LD when they are that young? It was then that we took her out of school and she has been homeschooled ever since. There are days when she can do anything, and then we have days when we are all on the verge of tears. I want her to be able to do anything and everything. But in reality, she will neve be a math scholar, scientist, or even a fast reader. She is now 13 and we still struggle daily. But I think that she is not the one who is supposed to be learning, nor I the one who is supposed to be teaching. God made this child perfect in everyway. She is the one who is teaching me and I am learning to understand her and the way God created her. When I put her inside the learning box, she crumbles under the pressure. When I open the box and let her out, she is like a butterfly emerging from a coccon. She is very visual. But I am to the point where I feel like I have to follow a more detailed curriculum path. But to be quite honest, I would love to just teach her from now on with unit studies, lapbooks, worksheets, and real life.
Ashley has the ability to excell in music and I make sure that she has every means to do so. Our living room is full of various instruments and right now she can play them all. God has given her a wonderful talent, but more so than that, he has given her a loving heart. This is where she teaches me. I sit back and watch her as she conducts her daily life. I can honestly say that this child never gets mad or raises her voice. Dh says she could be taking a shower in crud and still sing about it. I agree.
I am on the verge of tears as I write this, because I am ashamed to say that it has taken me years to get to this point with her. I have always been the angry mother who would yell at her child because she didn’t understand the math that we had just went over for the hundreth time, or because it took her twice as long to read something. So many times I have asked God to bless us with another child. No, I am not off topic, just bear with me. I look at our two girls and I think of what a mess I have made along the way. I guess I kept thinking that if we had more children I could undo what has been done. But I know that can never happen. I can only take what time I have left and make the best of it.